mom pro tip: packing snacks for the zoo
Do not ask questions.
Do not come at me with Bringing Up Bebe malarkey about snacking.
Just repeat after me:
When you go to the zoo
you either pack NO SNACKS
or
you pack enough snacks
for every child
in your party.
Not just your own child
slash children -
But
every
child
in
your
party.
And honestly
if you pack snacks
you can't pack too many.
Once other kids see that the snack bag has been opened
you'll be the pied piper of the penguin exhibit.
Probably
some teenagers will come up to you
and be like
'scuse me
ma'am
I heard there were cheddar bunnies?
And here is the key part -
the snacks that you pack
for every child
in your party
must
be
exactly
the
same.
 |
| great |
 |
| outstanding protein nice touch |
 |
| love it nuts are good fat plus no preservatives |
 |
| nice work bringing three pieces each of two different flavors be careful though when you pull them out you have to make sure that each kid eats the same flavor at the same time you can't be yanking out two cherries and a cashew like some kind of fucking moron |
 |
| nice nice wait |
 |
| checks out |
 |
| !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
HOLY SHIT
We have two cheds and a chip
I repeat
TWO CHEDS AND A CHIP
NO YOU CANNOT JUST SPLIT THE BAGS
ARE YOU EVEN A PARENT
OR ARE YOU JUST PLAYING ONE
ON FULL HOUSE
DID YOU EVEN CHECK THE BAGS BEFORE PACKING THEM
Hide them
Hide them now
There's no way this ends good.
The only thing left
is to end it fast.
Oh God...
No...
NO...
they spotted it.
And
everyone
wants
the chip.